Athazagoraphobia

Warning: word vomit ahead. 

Athazagoraphobia : the fear of being left behind, forgotten, or ignored.
I, lately, have been suffering from a severe case of jealousy that is rooted in the fear of being left behind. This is not a new discovery, just one that has reared its ugly head here lately.
Jackson and I had the baby fight. One of us is ready, the other is enjoying life as is and is concerned with finances not working out with a small human.  You get one guess who each describes. I'll give you a hint.  I'm ready... or I thought I was.
The more I got to thinking about it, the more I realized that my current bout of baby fever has come from a friend couple saying they were saving so she could stay home for a couple of years here soon when babies come. Soon. But I'm not ready for you to have kids because that means I have to have kids. 
What? What does them having kids have to do with us having kids? Because I don't want to be left behind.
I realize my apartment/house buying or "moving" itch has come from another friend couple saying they were moving into a bigger apartment in the next couple of months. Next couple of months. But, I like where we live and I'm not ready to move.  But I can move because they're moving.
What? Why do I have to move because they're moving? Because I don't want to be left behind.
My fear of being left behind is making me want things I don't yet want.  I'm completely content with our home. I love our life as newlyweds.  I'm not ready to move, and I'm not ready for kids. I am enjoying sleeping in on Saturdays, spending huge amounts of money on Linkin Park tickets, and picking up and going wherever and whenever we want to.  My challenge to myself will be being happy for those around me instead of wanting what they have or wanting to keep up.